Please, don’t do it. Don’t be an actor. Be anything else in the world.
I’m not talking about not being a professional actor. I’m talking about being an actor in italics. You see, actors are wonderfully creative people who are generally fun to be around actors are miserable, annoying and come off as crazy.
What is the difference between an actor and an actor besides the italics?
Actors are selfish. They don’t help their partners with their parts. They refuse to run lines after “they got it” and they won’t ever move a single piece of scenery. Actors are happy to help out people in need, they’re always there for their scene partners and they’re willing to help out a production any way they can because they undestand their star rises and falls along with the productions they’re associated with.
Actors are often overly competitive. It’s funny to see this at auditions. Actors feel the need to try to throw their competition off. They’ll give “advise” on how to do the part. They’ll tell other people auditioning “You look totally different than everyone else here.” I’ve even heard stories of people throwing away sides so the other actors can’t learn their lines. And does any of this help their chances at getting the part? Of course not. Actors, on the other hand, are gracious and friendly to people they audition with. If they can help out, they will. They put their best work out there and let the casting people do their job. It’s the person best suited for the job that gets it not the cattiest, unless you’re auditioning for Project Runway.
Actors consider themselves artists. I’m not saying acitng isn’t an art form, of course it is. But there’s a major difference between being a poet/painter and an actor. Poets and painters don’t depend on anyone else to keep doing their jobs. Actors need to be hired (or be accepted into a class) to keep working. Actors don’t get this and make themselves so difficult to work with that no one will ever want to hire them.
Actors are insane. Don’t know why but a large number of people giving Actors a bad name have something wrong with them. It’s like someone hung a sign at LAX saying “If you’re crazy, think about being an actor.” Actors are usually well balanced normal folks who can hold normal conversations and pass off at parties as normal people with normal jobs. The funny thing is, some of the people I know who work the most are very laid back and regular. They’re not overly theatrical or difficult to be around. Isn’t it funny how that works?
The reason this came up was that we recently cast the latest version of the Cricket Feet Showcase one of the first things we considered when casting actors was if they’d be hard to work with. We can’t focus 90% of our time on making one person happy, there’s just too much else to do. So if the actors auditioning were actors then we didn’t cast them.
I love working with Actors, I hate working with Actors. I feel like a white, Jewish, non-stand up comedian version of Chris Rock.